im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
We need to get me chipped asap
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
