He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?