gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
