I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
