in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
this boner is exhausting
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Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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