real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
