There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
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I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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