do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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