I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
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