drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize