After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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