Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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