Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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