Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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