The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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