so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
