We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize