i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize