he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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