new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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