I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize