we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
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