I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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