I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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