Whatcha textin bout Willis?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize