I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
