Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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