belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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