Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
