i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
