next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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