so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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