Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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