the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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