Texts From Last Night

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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.

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  (601): Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away. http://tfl.nu/uxou
  Replies (60) Good night (3602) Bad night (747)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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  (215): i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section http://tfl.nu/5gr0
  Replies (1639) Good night (172011) Bad night (43488)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result

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  (480): ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result http://tfl.nu/ejuh
  Replies (25) Good night (729) Bad night (3501)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them

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  (814): I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them http://tfl.nu/cf2l
  Replies (12) Good night (803) Bad night (3583)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.

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  (810): I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck. http://tfl.nu/kfpi
  Replies (5) Good night (2809) Bad night (1219)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.

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  (908): Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester. http://tfl.nu/ge44
  Replies (9) Good night (2212) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.

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  (757): It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog. http://tfl.nu/clzo
  Replies (3) Good night (1752) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.

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  (814): My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order. http://tfl.nu/pxpo
  Replies (21) Good night (2743) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon

  (514): View more from Quebec

  what does alcohol mean

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  (514): the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon (514): what does alcohol mean http://tfl.nu/hh45
  Replies (2) Good night (1500) Bad night (776)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina

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  (706): I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina http://tfl.nu/j6ze
  Replies (12) Good night (2384) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Thats Poetry

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  (610): Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is. (919): Thats Poetry http://tfl.nu/gxmw
  Replies (7) Good night (947) Bad night (467)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.

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  (919): Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him. http://tfl.nu/jn2a
  Replies (2) Good night (1007) Bad night (336)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!

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  (517): When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?! http://tfl.nu/3qvz
  Replies (0) Good night (562) Bad night (337)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  No piss test, hell yeah

  (248): View more from Michigan

  FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.

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  (248): No piss test, hell yeah (248): FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS. http://tfl.nu/hck1
  Replies (3) Good night (564) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.

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  (580): Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA. http://tfl.nu/0dmc
  Replies (3) Good night (1075) Bad night (366)

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