I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
We were destined to go to rehab together
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize