Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her. http://tfl.nu/lt69
  Replies (23) Good night (968) Bad night (4079)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary' http://tfl.nu/vbb1
  Replies (15) Good night (655) Bad night (2603)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My cat gives me a boner

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): My cat gives me a boner http://tfl.nu/df3i
  Replies (29) Good night (812) Bad night (6984)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts. http://tfl.nu/kee8
  Replies (27) Good night (5073) Bad night (2413)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level http://tfl.nu/3h42
  Replies (3) Good night (1482) Bad night (3849)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag... http://tfl.nu/qim6
  Replies (7) Good night (977) Bad night (3203)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo? http://tfl.nu/2zc2
  Replies (5) Good night (2581) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit. http://tfl.nu/gou5
  Replies (11) Good night (3688) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey. http://tfl.nu/h1y9
  Replies (7) Good night (3381) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph" http://tfl.nu/ju46
  Replies (31) Good night (2709) Bad night (1800)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin http://tfl.nu/paaj
  Replies (4) Good night (1220) Bad night (599)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message. http://tfl.nu/fe15
  Replies (1) Good night (1164) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers http://tfl.nu/zya2
  Replies (4) Good night (602) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I just told the sun to stop. That hungover. http://tfl.nu/3xc8
  Replies (3) Good night (533) Bad night (267)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need http://tfl.nu/txcf
  Replies (3) Good night (478) Bad night (207)

Randomize