Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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