I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
