I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina just recognized that song.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize