come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
