no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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