Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
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The panties match.
I'll be right there.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
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He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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