i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I believe in your delicious
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
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