We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
