she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
