Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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