i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize