You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
