my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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