Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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