Whoa Z and x make the same sound
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
