you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You are the jesus of drinking
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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