I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
