Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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