OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
