Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
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it's like her boobs came off with her bra
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
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